First Dances. What to Pick?

We often have long conversations with the wedding couple about special dances.  There’s the mother-son dance, the father-daughter dance, and of course, the first dance itself.  All three are sentimental, defining moments within the evening, and are worth the time and effort to ensure that each one really shines.

One common question is whether the live wedding band should be used to perform these songs, or whether to opt for the original recordings.  As wedding musicians ourselves, we believe that this is an extension of the broader conversation as to whether you want live music or a DJ for your wedding.  Sure, the DJ will spin the exact versions of the songs you know.  But if you hire a good band, they’ll be spot-on with their renditions of whichever songs you choose, and when it comes to the energy and emotion that live music creates, there’s simply no question – if you want these dances to be truly special, you use the band.

Then there’s deciding which song to use for each dance. The wedding music playlist is vast and wide; there are tons of options.  Some couples choose a classy jazz standard for their first dance: The Way You Look Tonight, or It Had to Be You.  Some choose a soul tune like You Are the Sunshine of My Life or a ballad like Have I Told You Lately.  Some go for a slightly more modern approach: Ed Sheeran’s Thinking Out Loud or John Legend’s All of Me. 

The same wide variety exists for the parent dances.  Jazz standards are still common, like What a Wonderful World or As Time Goes By, as well as classic oldies like Crazy Love and In My Life.  Some go for country: moms choose I Hope You Dance, and fathers choose My Wish. 

And sometimes the usual ballads and slow dances are traded in for a fun, up-tempo groove: say, Best of My Love for dad and daughter; We Are Family for mom and son; or the iconic (I’ve Had the) Time of My Life, from Dirty Dancing, complete with the lift at the end.  Some of these wedding party songs will result in the entire crowd joining in halfway through, which makes for a truly fantastic scene.

The main point is that there’s no right or wrong choices here.  Ultimately, you just want to make sure you’ve chosen a tune that makes both of you really happy.  Sometimes it’s a song that’s nostalgic or has particular significance, and sometimes it just resonates a message that both of you love.

Slow dance, or fast dance; choreograph the entire routine, or make it up as you go.  As long as you believe in your song choice, and you’ve got the band behind you, it’ll make for a moment you’ll never forget.